We can’t control what others do and we can’t stop misfortune from striking. But we can control our own actions. Those who are financially prudent will most likely enjoy success, even if events don’t always go their way.
SOME FOLKS SEEM HAPPY to tell the world how much they earn, how much they have in the bank and what their portfolio is worth. Not me.
If I were to share my income and net worth, I’d expect some serious consequences, and not just from local thieves. In fact, I’m so cautious I have a plan not to tell anyone, except my wife Connie, if I win the lottery.
To be sure, overt sharing often isn’t necessary. The way we live can be revealing enough. Having two homes and spending much of the winter in Florida is a clear sign the Connie and I aren’t living solely on Social Security. Still, there are plenty of good reasons that I and others don’t reveal everything about our finances.
Getting judged. Will we be seen as rich and out of touch, or average and unsuccessful? Some folks may even fear being judged poor and deserving of pity.
Embarrassment. Could revealing details about our financial situation, including any debt, cause shame or guilt about lavish spending? Would learning about others cause us to question our earning power or life choices?
Power dynamics. Money can be seen as a source of power. Do we risk that by revealing more about our finances, which is a standard measure of success in our society?
Social norms. There are unspoken rules when talking about money. It might be considered rude or inappropriate to bring it up, even in casual conversation. “Nice to meet you. How much do you earn? Do you have a credit card balance? I don’t.” That’s going to be a short friendship.
Lack of knowledge. Many people don’t have a good understanding of personal finance and might feel insecure about that. Talking about money or investments could reveal their ignorance.
Comparison and competition. Talking about money can sometimes lead to rivalry, including among family members, which can be especially damaging. It might also create envy and resentment, and perhaps expectations of sharing.
Right or wrong, money is a key measure of success in our society. Sure, we can all list things that are more important. Still, what we earn, how much we spend and our net worth are yardsticks we all use. We even measure happiness using money. A recent survey found 59% of Americans think money buys happiness.
So, when it comes to our financial lives, mum’s the word.
I don’t know if Jim Carrey understands, happiness is not necessarily about being rich, but more about not being poor.
From that survey…
“If money can buy happiness, the average person thinks it can be bought for just over $1 million, according to a new poll.” ($1.2M)
“Still, fewer than 1 in 5 respondents, 17 percent, said financial happiness is defined by reaching a certain net worth. And around two-thirds associated financial happiness with an on-time bill payment and debt-free status.”
Dad always told us it’s rude to ask someone about their finances or to brag, or complain about your own.
We have helped the kids and grandkids many times, not always “equally”, their needs are not equal.
They know we are comfortable*, but I suspect if knew our income and assets, they might expect more generosity.
We have a will that distributes assets to the heirs according to my wife’s wishes. I haven’t, and won’t, tell her that if she passes first, I will distribute everything immediately. I will have enough income to live comfortably and rather help the kids out before I go.
*Not enough to winter in Florida comfortable, but no regrets.
I never met a person when asked how did you make out with your raise say “yeah, I got too much”. Generally you accept what you got unless someone else says they got more. Why tell people what you make. You may make them unhappy or worse yet, it may make you unhappy.
QUINNSCOMMENTARY 
“A recent survey found 59% of Americans think money buys happiness.”
https://i.redd.it/i-wish-everyone-could-get-rich-and-famous-jim-carrey-500×754-v0-540crxla8kz91.jpg?s=e342b645f84ae6bd39b3648a6e91f18c89f7d773
I don’t know if Jim Carrey understands, happiness is not necessarily about being rich, but more about not being poor.
From that survey…
“If money can buy happiness, the average person thinks it can be bought for just over $1 million, according to a new poll.” ($1.2M)
“Still, fewer than 1 in 5 respondents, 17 percent, said financial happiness is defined by reaching a certain net worth. And around two-thirds associated financial happiness with an on-time bill payment and debt-free status.”
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Talking to myself, is that bad?
I don’t consider $1.2M to be rich*, it’s about what one might consider an adequate (barely) nest egg for a retirement account.
* No, I don’t have that much, neither do most people. I have a comfortable pension, though, and that makes me very happy.
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Dad always told us it’s rude to ask someone about their finances or to brag, or complain about your own.
We have helped the kids and grandkids many times, not always “equally”, their needs are not equal.
They know we are comfortable*, but I suspect if knew our income and assets, they might expect more generosity.
We have a will that distributes assets to the heirs according to my wife’s wishes. I haven’t, and won’t, tell her that if she passes first, I will distribute everything immediately. I will have enough income to live comfortably and rather help the kids out before I go.
*Not enough to winter in Florida comfortable, but no regrets.
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I never met a person when asked how did you make out with your raise say “yeah, I got too much”. Generally you accept what you got unless someone else says they got more. Why tell people what you make. You may make them unhappy or worse yet, it may make you unhappy.
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