Where is snobbery when you need it?

Yesterday was our 53rd wedding anniversary. As we try to do each year we splurged on a nice dinner at an upscale restaurant. Exchanging gifts has long been over between us. What could we possibly need?

The thing is it appears the idea of fine dining in a nice atmosphere has gone the way of men taking their hat off while eating.

Call me a snob, judgmental or just old fashioned, but when I’m paying $250 for dinner I don’t want the guy at the next table wearing a hoody sweatshirt, jeans with a dirty handkerchief hanging from his back pocket and with the table manners of a Neanderthal.

The restaurant says proper attire required or was it appropriate causal attire? In any case who dares enforce any criteria? Traditional definitions of proper and appropriate no longer apply.

As we were finishing our dinner some older couples arrived properly dressed followed by several young ladies also in jeans looking more prepared for a tailgate party than fine dining.

If America seeks a classless society, we are well on our way to eliminating class and embracing mediocrity.

Nothing seems special anymore, not even I nice meal. 😢

Oh yeah, in a restaurant with a 300 plus bottle wine list, the guy in the hoody had a beer, yeah, I am a snob and proud of it.


  1. It is a shame you could not focus on what was important that night – your lovely bride. I am just just shaking my head in disbelief to the acceptance of bigotry in this blog post and the comments. Snobbery is a form of bigotry. No wonder there is such hate in the world today. I was raised to believe that America is a melting pot, not a bunch of classes to separate us. And people today are wondering why we have the problems that exist today. Unbelievable.


  2. “If America seeks a classless society, we are well on our way to eliminating class and embracing mediocrity.”

    Fine dining??? What difference does it make what someone else wears or orders? The fact that anyone can afford $250 for a meal for 2 and chooses to go out to eat with Covid, is not mediocrity, no matter how they are dressed. I am sure the restaurant owner cannot afford to turn anyone away, as their money helps pay the bills. Maybe next year have the meal catered to your home, lol. Of course I would be the one in the jeans and hoody as that is my go to outfit in retirement. lol.

    When I was 21 buying my first new car, the salesman told me a story when he first started selling cars. It seems his coworkers were picky about tire kickers and anyone who dressed down was pushed off on him. One day a guy came in wearing torn jeans and a dirty white tee shirt. His coworkers laughed as he went to talk to the guy. The guy purchased a new Cadillac and paid cash, he made $400, a lot in 1970, $2,941 today. It turned out he was the owner of the local supermarket. After that his coworkers never gave up a customer to him.


    1. I think it makes a difference. It shows respect (not the beer, of course) If someone goes to a restaurant for a special occasion and that restaurant purports to be upscale, special if you will, they have a right to expect a dignified ambiance. I feel the same if a person is attending a wedding or other special occasion. They should show respect and dress as requested. It used to be called manners. As far as COVID goes, we went early to avoid a crowd, we are both fully vaccinated and I had COVID. The restaurant had clear plastic shields between tables and the staff was masked. How often does one have a 53rd anniversary, one they don’t want to spend at McDonalds?


      1. Then, next time find a restaurant that has the dress code you want. You assumed that a dress code would be enforced, your first mistake. My wife and I only go to restaurants on birthdays and our anniversary, June 20th, our 44th will be next year. We have 2 upscale restaurants in our town of 60,000 and they do not enforce any dress code, I have seen people in shorts, crazy! That is even something I would not do. Also, the food and service at any restaurants I have been to in the last 5 years, is not worth what you have to pay.


  3. This past spring my wife and I were in New Orleans. We went to dinner at a fancy white table cloth restaurant on Bourbon St., but we didn’t know it when we walked in. It was 89 F and 100% humidity outside and I was wearing shorts. Apparently there was a dress code but we didn’t know it. Also another couple had reservations and they didn’t know it either. Our hotel was across the street and I was going to go back and change but they “let us” dine in the bar. I guess after all the covid restrictions they were not going to let money walk out the door. I don’t know how big the wine list was, but they had Pappy Van Winkle 23-yr-old for only $240 a shot. At $240 a shot it could never ever live up to what I remember when a whole bottle was half that price.

    Today, torn designer jeans can cost $240 so maybe that is dressed up instead of Walmart jeans?

    In Las Vegas, my wife and I used to get dressed up every night but after 911 things got scaled back. Luggage fees and TSA screening made sweat suits and slip on shoes popular with the tourist and it seems like we were outcasts. You never knew if the guy next to you on the plane was going to drop $10K in Las Vegas.

    But I am with you. If I wanted to eat at a dinner with screaming kids or people wearing hoodies, I would have gone to a diner.

    Happy Anniversary.


  4. On that note….whatever happened for the server to wait for all those dining before starting to clear the dinnerware?? When and why did this become acceptable even in the very high end service restaurants(200+/dinner)?
    It just isn’t necessary, as they eventually have to clear the other diners plate anyway and it makes the person still finishing their meal feel very self conscious. Growing up dining in very expensive restaurants I have been totally mystified how this practice began and has been allowed to flourish…another sign of seeking mediocrity!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Completely agree! To me it is sad but too true everything you have said. Hope you enjoyed your celebration out regardless of the ‘come dressed as you are’ patrons.


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